dangerous compassions

this may be the night / our bodies fill with light

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

spicy green curry with plastic bit, collard greens, newtons, ice cream, upma

Today started out horribly.  We almost went to the beach.  Instead we stayed in town.  We ran some errands--I made copies. 

Then we went out to lunch and there was a piece of plastic in my food.  We got my dish taken off the bill, which was good.  My Thai iced tea was delicious.

Then we went to the art supply store where I got a drawing pen.  Then we went to the library, where I wrote a sad letter to my bestie.

Then we came home and picked collard greens and an onion and some garlic.  We brought these things to church, and Swami gave us some cookies in return.  I thought they were strawberry newtons, but Ming thinks they were apple.

Then we went to this ice cream social at Arden Dimick to kick off summer reading.  We were the only people in line who were not kids or adults with kids.  We were kidless.  We were like, are we allowed to be here?  But it turned out we were allowed to be there.  We filled out these forms about values.  I said the library's main value for me was sharing.  I wrote some socialist stuff.  Go me!  I said how you don't need money to read books or use the computers at the library.  And then I talked about love.

Then we went to this Indian grocery store I like.  I kind of wanted Indian ramen, but we ended up getting upma mix.  I made upma for dinner.  I put in some onion, garlic, and finely chopped collard greens from our back garden.  It tasted delish.

Monday, June 17, 2013

Egyptian walking onions

Ming took pics of our Egyptian walking onions.  They live in bed six.  Toward the upper right you can see the small cluster of bulblets.  I am very happy about these onions.

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Spirited Away

Today Ming and I watched Spirited Away.  It was about the fifth movie we've seen together.  We watched it in bed, on his laptop.  It was his first time seeing it and my second. 

I like No-Face a lot, and I like the part where the river spirit gives the main character a magical prize, when everything gets quiet and mystical. 

Then we ate chips with green salsa and it's 97 degrees outside.  We finished the shit-ton of forms we had to do.  We listened to Sufjan Stevens, I wrote two letters, and it's a low key day.

Saturday, June 15, 2013

pistachio butter

We bought the pistachio butter.  It's super delicious.  But it's better licked off the knife than spread on the bread.

We bought the pistachio butter at this fruit stand near Davis.  It cost ten bucks for a little jar.  It's a delicacy, vegan heaven, and not for every day.  

We stopped at the fruit stand near Davis on our way to Berkeley.  Ming's son R graduated high school.  I photocopied functionally ill 8, we had Indian-Pakistani food for lunch, we met Ming's mom for coffee, and Ming went to the graduation with his mom while I hung out at a cafe and met my friend K for dinner.  We went to Herbivore, which I had heard of, but I was unimpressed with my pretend chicken mole.  But the ginger lemonade was fantastic. 

I got a heavy packet of forms in the mail that I have ten days to fill out.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

applications

This morning we helped a friend turn in an application in time.  I printed out four application packets, and each packet was thick.  I don't think my printer had ever seen that kind of action!  The applications were due in Woodland by noon, and we left home around 11:25.  That was cutting it close, considering we had never been to the campus we were delivering the applications to.  But we made it--luckily the administration building was easy to find, and I wandered into the right office. 

"What can I do for you?" a dressed up man asked.

"I need to turn in these applications," I said.

"What kind of applications?" he asked.

"English full-time tenured and English full-time temporary," I said.  He looked at them.

"You need to give them to her," he said, gesturing to the woman who was on the phone. 

"Thanks," I said, wanting her to get off the phone.  It was ten till. 

Finally she got off the phone and held out her hand for the applications.

"Thank you and good luck," she said. 

Then I phoned Ming to see where he was parked.  Then I phoned the friend I did all that for.  If he succeeds in getting the job, he will move to Sacramento. 

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

doing the mailing

I took a few pictures of Ming and me doing the mailing at our temple.  Every month we spend a few hours preparing the bulletins to mail. 


Paper folder, stacks of bulletins and the two fliers that were included as well, piles of envelopes sorted by zip code...


Here's an action shot of Ming doing the work.  We prepare the bulletin in the library--not the public library, but my temple's library.  It's a beautiful place! 

seeing Amma

Did I tell you about how we went to see Amma?  I did, but I didn't show you any pictures.  Possibly my favorite part of the day was walking the labyrinth with Ming, and here's a picture of that.


Here's the peace pole out front of the main hall at Amma's ashram.  I love peace poles!


Unrelatedly, here's a street art pole near the Sacramento cafe that's near Southside Park.

red walnuts

Oh, and I forgot to say we tried red walnuts at this great store called The Olive Pit in Corning where you can try, I'm not exaggerating, at least 25 different kinds of olives.  Red walnuts are delicious.

crystals

We camped!  We hiked (about one mile up) Mt Shasta!  Ming hiked Black Butte!  We noticed the town of Mt Shasta is full of crystals!  Seriously, there are a lot of crystal shops.  I went to one and bought a beautiful art magnet and a card for a friend.

And we wrote a song.  It goes like this.

Once upon a time,
I went to Mt Shasta the town.
I saw the most beautiful bumblebee
that ever could be found.
I said to my darling,
"Let's make a bumblebee song."
He said if he knew it
he would sing along.

Oh Bumblebee!
Oh Bumblebee!
I want you to
bumble with me.
Oh Bumblebee!
Oh Bumblebee!
I love you--
don't fly into my tea.


Here's a picture I took of Ming at the base of Mt Shasta.


Here's the most beautiful view of Mt Shasta that Ming photographed from the top of Black Butte at 6325 feet, he tells me.


Here's the foundation of the lookout house that used to be at the top of Black Butte.


This picture Ming took at the top too, of a metal pole that was stuck in the rock, a mystery.

ps  Bumblebees are important because the worker at Mt Shasta's outdoorsy store Fifth Season said there have been reports of lots of bumblebees at the top of Mt Shasta.  So bumblebees were on our mind, and so we made a song about them.

Sunday, June 09, 2013

rad salad

I just ate the most delicious salad.

cut in half very small tomatoes
homemade lentil sprouts
raw English peas
Goddess dressing
avocado
walnut bits

"Do you covet my salad?" I asked Ming as I ate.

"No," he said.  "Do you covet my muffin?"  He was eating a raisin bran muffin.

I made a face.  "No," I said.

Saturday, June 08, 2013

holy crap

It's 117 degrees outside!

edit to add:  The weather website I use says it only got to 108 yesterday.  So I guess there was a malfunction at the weather station I use?

LSNC

I want to remember this url for Legal Services of Northern California.  I might need them or they can point me in the right direction when my SSI application is denied.

http://lsnc.net

miracle from Florida, luchador, quest for pistachio butter

Holy crap, it's supposed to be 111 today. 

Yesterday we went to San Francisco to see my old friend MM.  I was meeting her in person for the first time.  I was so excited.  She is a miracle from Florida.  We had vegan Japanese food then ice cream and visited Needles and Pens. 

Then Ming and I went to Berkeley to my favorite stationery store Elmwood so Ming could find a graduation card for his younger son who is graduating high school in one week.  We went to a cafe, Espresso Roma, and I wrote a letter to AL.  Ming started reading Making Home and loves it like I do.  Then we wrote a postcard to our friend BB together and talked. 

Oh, in the Mission District we also went to a Mexican arts and crafts store to buy Ming a silver ring.  It matches mine.  We paid $20 cash to the nice worker.  Someone came inside looking for a mirror.  He was wearing a blue and gold Mexican wrestling mask.

Today we're supposed to go to a work day at the community garden.  It's too hot, and I am overstimulated from yesterday, but we've missed quite a few. 

We stopped at this fruit stand for pistachio butter on our way home from the Bay Area, but they were closed.  I am on a quest for pistachio butter after seeing it, wanting it, and not buying it a few weeks ago.

Thursday, June 06, 2013

crazy / enlightened

The apartment complex's washing machine is broken...again! 

The bread at free breakfast this morning was moldy, but then some other bread was not.  I ate apples & cinnamon oatmeal.  There were teenaged boys volunteering today.

I'm listening to some throat singer monks on tape.  We went see P the other day.  We went through an old box of tapes she didn't want anymore.  I sorted them into piles: church, thrift store, trash, and me.  Went through cds too.  I borrowed back some cds I made her years ago.

This morning at church food giveaway, they were giving away boxes and boxes of precooked chicken rice, which we had to refuse.  But we accepted boxes and boxes of apple sauce in squeeze pouches.  "This is a lifetime supply of apple sauce!" I told Ming.

Later he said, "I hope it's not a lifetime supply of apple sauce."  He wants to outlive the apple sauce supply.

They gave us frozen cinnamon rolls, and I'm baking them in the oven right now.  Also we received strawberries, a red bell pepper, a loaf of bread, some french rolls, some popcorn, two boxes of mac and cheese, a snack bar thing...  I wanted to take some potatoes, but Ming said we have access to our main neighbor's huge potato stash.

I can't tell whether the throat singing monks are making me feel crazy or enlightened or what.  I definitely feel something.

Wednesday, June 05, 2013

vegan sopa de fideos

I found this old cookzine I made ten years ago, back when I wasn't a vegetarian but was a no mammal eater.  It's called What We Eat.

For lunch today I made spinach soup from a recipe in that cookzine--it's adapted from a recipe in the Tassajara recipe book, the yellow one.  It was so good.

And then for dinner I made sopa de fideos.  We went to the Mexican grocery store for some fideo, which is just broken up vermicelli.  It cost 34 cents.  All the rest of the ingredients we already had.  It was also so good.  It's a noodle soup, I guess, but it's kind of like spaghetti. 

vegan sopa de fideos

Chop half an onion and half a bell pepper.  Chop some garlic  Saute in olive oil with some fideos, a 7 to 10 oz package.  Saute until the veggies are done and the noodles are browning.  Add a can of tomatoes, three cups of boiling water, half a tsp cumin, half a tsp chili powder, a little garlic powder, and some salt.  Cook for 10 minutes, until the noodles are done.  Let it sit for a few minutes then serve. 

apricot refigerator jam

We made refrigerator jam this morning, and it seems to have set!  We followed this recipe, pretty much, but halved it.

http://foodsforlonglife.blogspot.com/2009/07/how-to-make-organic-sugar-free-apricot.html

And we didn't can it--we just poured it into jars and let them cool on the counter and put them in the fridge.  It made about a pint and a third of apricot jam.

(I was alarmed by how much the Pomona's Universal Pectin costs at the co-op, but I guess that's the price you gotta pay for low sugar.  And I was surprised by how much organic frozen apple juice concentrate costs at the co-op too--more than $4!  Maybe I'm stuck in the past.)

Here are my notes for next time.

Wash, pit, finely chop apricots.
Three cups in pan with 1/4 cup lemon juice.
Add four tsp calcium water.
In a separate pan:
one cup apple concentrate--boil.
Add 3 tsp pectin and blend well.
Boil apricot mixture.
Add apple juice mixture to apricot mixture.
Return to boil and remove from heat.
DONE

Calcium water: half tsp calcium powder in half cup water.

Tuesday, June 04, 2013

rear ended, unscathed

Today we left the temple, stopped at a stop sign, and the car behind us didn't.  They hit BOB, our truck--our truck's name is BOB, short for Bucket of Bolts.  I felt the impact and said, "Shit!" then, "What was that about?"  Ming pulled over calmly and we assessed the damage.  We had none, but the other person's car had some.  So we traded info.  It was okay.  But I never like that impact feeling, and afterward I was extra-scared of being hit or hitting someone. 

From the temple we got some apricots.  I want to make some jam.

seeing Amma for the second time

Yesterday we went to see Amma.  We left here at 6:45 hoping to get there at 8, but there were traffic jams and a wrong turn.  So we got there at 9, which was okay.

It was my second time at Amma's ashram in San Ramon.  But last time I didn't even know about the pond.  Yesterday I spent a lot of time at the pond, which has swans in it.  I also saw great blue herons, a wood duck, a coot, and something that I think was a kingfisher, but I didn't get a good look.

This time was different with Ming.  Last time I carpooled with church friends but felt alone.  This time I was very much with Ming.  "Do you want to get our hug together or separately?" he asked me.

"I didn't even know you knew we could get our hug together," I told him.  At first I said separately, greedy for my own hug.  But then I changed my mind.  "Then it would be like our relationship was being blessed," I said.

Our tokens said K3.  I was by the pond when Amma arrived so didn't see her arrive.  When I was there years ago, I saw her car drive up and saw her smiling face in the window, just like in the pictures, and it was a joy to see her.

This time, like going to the Sacred Peace Walk for the second time, I felt less dazzled, a little detached, as if protecting myself from the intensity.

When Ming and I were hugged, Ming was grabbed first.  She spoke mantras in his ear.  Then I was grabbed, and she held me to her and spoke mantras in my ear too.  Workers threw flower petals and gave me a hershey's kiss.  Later I saw that they'd marked Ming's forehead with a bindi, but they didn't mark mine.  It was all fast.  They try to get you in and out of there. 

Afterward I was happy.  We got our shoes and bags.  Oh, I forgot to say I bought myself a necklace.  It's made of tulsi and cost $3.  It's tan or light brown and looks like something I would wear.  We thought about buying a tulsi plant as well, for ourselves or someone else, but in the end, we decided not to.

Driving out of the ashram, we were asked if we would give a ride to some Indian devotees.  I gave the front seat to the older of the two.  It's hard, climbing in and out of the back seat.  We talked--the younger of the two was named Chandra.  "Like moon?" I asked.  He said yes and seemed happy--Chandra means moon.  He and his traveling companion were both doctors.  He asked if we were coming back for the 8 o'clock program, but I said no, we were heading home.

So then we went to Berkeley for a late lunch.  We met Ming's mom at the restaurant, and it was good to talk.  She told us about her recent trip to England, Ireland, and Wales. 

Oh, I forgot to say there's a labyrinth, and we walked the labyrinth together.  No one else was around.  It was a little walk to get there.  I left pennies at the center and we kissed.

Monday, June 03, 2013

no more zine library at Central

The zine library at Central is no more.  I asked the workers and they didn't even remember it.  I guess it's been a while.  I was sad.

Sunday, June 02, 2013

we slip through the streets while everyone sleeps

I'm delighted by the Catholic Worker legend about the thousand cats.

http://lovecats.catholicworker.biz

hot

Yesterday was busy.  We helped at a garden installing party for an hour in the morning--I dug out some grass but mostly stood around.  Ming helped build the frame of a raised bed and ate a donut.  Then we went to a memorial service at church, and the choir sang a song, the song we sing for memorial services.  We left early.  Then Ming and I went to the library, and I wrote a poem I like.  I read a little too.  Almost done with Making Home.  Then we came home and rested--the heat was terrible--it got to 100.  Then we did Food Not Bombs bread pickup at 6. 

At 9 last night I looked out the window and saw the sky wasn't dark.  I was surprised then realized it is June.

Another east coast friend is coming to San Francisco, and I hope I can see her.  It'll be our first time meeting in person.  She made a zine maybe seven years ago, and I became her friend although she was in high school.  She graduated high school and went to college and graduated college too, in Florida.

I'm chatting with a friend in Manchester and trying to decide what to make for breakfast.

And that's the news as of 7:24 this morning.

Friday, May 31, 2013

Musee Mechanique and other delights

Yesterday we went to San Francisco to see my old friend P and his ex J.  I have known P through zines for maybe seven years.  It was our second time meeting in person.  He lives in New York.

Let me tell you about our day yesterday.  I will somewhat quote from a postcard I just wrote to my bestie AL.

Traffic jams, burritos, ice cream at Dolores Park, someone trying to sell us pot rice crispie treats.  The Musee Mechanique where you put in a quarter or two and get to see something. 

Here is a partial list of mechanical things we saw.

*Laughing Sal
*a test of strength where you grab a pretend bull by the horns and squeeze them together--I did so so
*a boxing game where two little metal figures box and you control them with gun-like things
*an execution where someone is read their last rites then hanged
*an execution where someone is read their last rites then guillotined
*a laughing drunken sailor
*a drunken mime who taps his foot against the glass of his case and leans against a lightpole
*a test of strength we didn't really understand which involves striking a piece of metal with your finger
*an arm wrestling machine
*a pony kids can ride
*a test of strength where you punch a punching bag--didn't seem to be working
*a fortune telling thing where something reads your palm and it spits out a paper fortune
*a fortune telling grandma
*a fortune telling gypsy
*another fortune telling grandma
*another laughing drunken sailor
*four dancing sailors in white
*some wild west people who fart--there was a sign for this one saying "Don't play if you're easily offended"
*a thing where you kiss your mate and a wheel spins around to land on a rating of the kiss--the kiss Ming and I shared was rated "passionate"
*a zoetrope
*a huge mini fair complete with ferris wheel
* huge mini farm
*a thing where you spin the wheel and different jobs light up--I got Beautician
*video games including my favorite, Bust-a-Move II
*pinball machines
*skeet ball
*whack a mole
*things where you look and see a little move like an earthquake or world's fair
*a helicopter
*a thing where you make a metal ball climb
*a thing where you shoot metal balls that land in holes with different point values
*a funhouse mirror

I remember a lot, but there were way more than this.  Sorry I didn't take a single picture.

We also went to Needles and Pens.  It didn't open till noon, so we got Mexican popsickles and waited.  Ming got rum raisin which was creamy and delicious.  I got watermelon which tasted like laundry detergent.  "Shampoo," Ming said.

Needles and Pens opened late.  While we waited a tour came by.  The tour guide explained it was an anarchist store so you couldn't trust them to open on time.  The tour guide explained what DIY is and what zines are.  It was great to hear.

Inside we looked at lots of zines and cards and books.  Ming looked at some wallets.  I liked many things and bought nothing, which is appropriate because I have about 150 zines on my to read pile from various fests and trades and even purchases.

We got burritos at this bright taqueria.  We got ice cream at Bi-Rite Creamery.  I got Brown Sugar with a ginger caramel swirl and Cheesecake with a rhubarb swirl.  They complimented me on my selection.  Ming got coffee toffee in a sugar cone.

We saw the name Ming in a band name on a flier and on a huge ship.

After all this we went to Indian Pakistani food in Berkeley and came home.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

new plants


Here is the basil we planted today in bed three.


Here's some yerba buena that we planted months ago in a pot.  To its left is some lemon balm, and to its lower right is some mint.


Here's a garbanzo bean we planted--we planted three in bed four.


Here's rue, which is an herb with a strange background.  I mean, it's very symbolic--for example, it's the one plant a basilisk can't wilt with a glance, and weasels who have been bitten by the basilisk go off and eat rue to recover and return to the fight.


Finally here's the marionberry!  I think we're naming it Orange Tree.  Or maybe not.

zombie fear

I forgot to tell you that when Ming and I walked to Safeway yesterday around 8 in the morning, no one was out.  "Where is everybody?" I asked.  Then I realized it was Memorial Day and everyone was home eating pancakes.  But I started feeling creeped out by the lack of people, as if there was a zombie apocalypse and everyone else knew the zombies were on a rampage but us, and the zombies were going to find and kill us.  It was a strange fear.  I told Ming how I have zombie dreams though I have never once watched a zombie movie.

Monday, May 27, 2013

cute little sweet potato


This sweet potato started sprouting, so Ming put it in water, and it's grown into a beautiful plant on the windowsill.

Rubaiyat quote

Today we walked to the nearest Safeway for another fruit run.  It was fun.  And for the first time I saw this quote on a wall next to a non-flowing fountain.  Love it!


Sunday, May 26, 2013

fruit run

We needed fruit bad.  So we went on a fruit run.  We got organic strawberries and organic grapes, because both should be organic, as well as two organic apricots, for which we paid a pretty penny.  We bought an avocado too.  The strawberries are already gone, and they were delicious.  Haven't bought any cherries yet this year because they're supposed to be organic.  Safeway doesn't carry organic cherries.  How many dollars a pound do you think organic cherries cost in Sacramento, California? 

Neutral Milk Hotel -- King of Carrot Flowers Prt 1



This song is not an easy read, but I suggest listening to it at least once.

late spring backyard garden today

Ming took some garden pics for me and for you. 


First are the sunchokes.  There are growing in this pot that doesn't drain well.  They're in with what look like some dead tree collards, but they are just sleeping.


Here is our grapevine.  Its name is Fig Tree.  Doesn't it look lush and great?


Here's bed six.  You can see the huge lemon verbena in the back.  It was just a cute little organic start last year...  And you can see some onions on the left, a tree collard on the right, some buckwheat in the middle.


And here's bed five, a good late afternoon picture of it with the carrot flowers in front, some tree collards on the right, Fig Tree in back, some buckwheat, a marigold.  Can't see the vibrantly blooming bright pink yarrow which is to the right of the collards.

pancakes, rice pudding, orange juice

This morning I was making pancakes and reached in the case of soymilk to get more soymilk and cut my finger on the cardboard.  Wtf, cardboard paper cut!  But the pancakes were really good.  They were vegan cornmeal almond pancakes.

This morning was Buddha puja.  We sang at choir practice and sounded pretty bad, not knowing who all would show up for the actual puja, but then more singers showed up.  And we sounded fine at the actual puja.  Then there was lunch, including rice pudding, and I bought a copy of the Dhammapada for P from the temple bookstore.  The person running the bookstore and I compared two translations, and it was fun to read aloud from both of them.  The $11 translation won--we rejected the $9 Penguin translation.

Yesterday we went to a party and lived to tell the tale.  I think we lasted about an hour, maybe 45 minutes.  The living room was small.  I drank some good orange juice.  We saw the plants growing out back--we saw the bunnies.  We saw our friend's books in a different context--this is the fourth home I've known her to live in.  I guess she moves a lot.  We got some good hugs.

Friday, May 24, 2013

earthquake

Last night I was lying in bed.  Ming was in the bathroom brushing his teeth.  And then the bed was moving.  I thought, "I must be really dizzy.  But it really does feel like the bed is moving."  Then I thought it must have been an earthquake. 

"Did you feel an earthquake just now?" I asked Ming, and he said no.  Then I looked up at the ceiling fan's pull-thing (what do you call those?) and it was still moving.  So I was convinced it was an earthquake, but Ming looked online and there was nothing. 

But in the morning Ming looked it up differently and saw it was a five point something near Susanville, which is pretty far away. 

I've felt several earthquakes in my life.  Some felt like a jolt to the building, as if the building got hit by a car.  I felt the big one during that world series baseball game in San Francisco when I was a kid--felt it all the way in Santa Maria. 

I don't like them.  But they can't be stopped.  They are interesting at least.

Thursday, May 23, 2013

king of carrot flowers


Finally the camera is working, and here is the picture of carrot flowers that I promised you.

emotional work

I've been going through boxes looking for an important document that I think I know where it was at my old place, but I have no idea where it is now.  Well, I have an idea: it's in a box.  But which box?  I went through some old ones and threw away a metric ton of letters from an ex-friend.  It's bittersweet to let them go.

Today we got lots of expired, cooked brown rice at a food giveaway at the nearby church.  We got applesauce in squeezable pouches too.  It has cinnamon in it.  And some bread, and a green bell pepper.

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

garden lists May 2013

I made this list of everything we have growing in our gardens and thought you might like to see.

community garden plot

onions
tree kale
oregano
Mexican marjoram
lavender
Greek mountain tea
celery--stubborn, we keep ripping it out
asparagus
echinacea
opium poppies
California poppies
lemon balm or catnip--not sure
borage
strawberries--not producing
chives
white sage
yarrow with bright pink flowers
yerba buena
thyme
potatoes
buckwheat


backyard--six beds plus

onions
tree collards
lemon verbena
oregano
tomatoes--stupice, unknown from MyPlant, 1000 cherry tomato, unknown from neighbors
green beans--unknown from neighbors
snap peas or snow peas--from neighbors
Christmas lima bean?--not sure which of the beans is coming up
lemon cucumbers
fava beans
carrots
garlic
cauliflower
celery--blooming
parsley--blooming
chard
zucchini
bay laurel
corn
Moro blood orange named Mary
sunchokes
lettuce--blooming
bell pepper--not thriving
yarrow with bright pink flowers
yarrow that has not bloomed but is supposed to be white
yerba buena
lemon balm
grapevine named Fig Tree
grapevine cuttings that might or might not be still alive
aloe
bright purple succulent--neighbors
mint--gone wild
potatoes
buckwheat
marigolds
strawberries
New Zealand spinach
naked ladies